thinking God's thoughts on marriage and sex

This day and age marriage is not viewed a long lasting covenant between a man and a woman. The world will marry and when it gets hard will get a divorce. They go into marriage saying, "we will see how it goes". Marriage is HOLY because of the covenant between the couple and God. Marriage can be the most satisfying relationship.

Charity touched on 4 points about Marriage and Sex:

1) You need to highly esteem marriage. You value your husband when you esteem your marriage. You and your husband become one flesh when married.

2) Swallow your Pride. Learn to say 3 little words, "I am sorry".
Some people say that when he changes - I will change. Prov. 16:18 says, "Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall."

Eph5:33 states, "However, each one of you almost must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband." You need to regard and notice our husbands - consider them. You choose to do what is right. Whatever you want for yourself, give to your husband.

She suggested a great book by Dr. Laura, The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands.

3) Don't keep score
We are to compliment each other. Gen. 2:18 says, "The Lord God said, "It is not good for man to be alone, I will make a helper suitable for him." God made us different for a reason. We are not the same and shouldn't be the same. Men are providers and women are nutures. This does not mean women cannot work or men cannot stay home. Don't try and make your husband like you - stay out of your own way. Marriage is not 50/50 it's 100/100! Give all you have in your marriage and worry about your own end.

4) Control your tongue
Prov. 31:26 says, "She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction in on her tongue. This verse is talking about the Proverbs 31 woman. Notice it says "she speaks". It doesn't - "she speaks when spoken to". She speaks with wisdom! As a wife/mother - you need to pray for wisdom. In one translation it says she speaks wisely and nicely and gives counsel and instruction. Counsel is giving adivce and instruction is telling someone how something needs to be done.
We always have our way of doing things and we think it is the best/only way and - you know - your husband has a different way of doing things but STILL gets the job done - give it up- and let him do things.
-Don't share arguments wtih others - keep it private.
-Don't mother your husbands. Sometimes when you are used to being in "mommy mode" it's easy to be that way to your husbands.
-Nuture your relationship
- love and affection
- have a common hobby
- give back rubs
- sex - you cannot separate sex and marriage. It is a vital part of marriage. Good sex = good marriage, bad sex = bad marriage
1 Cor. 6:16
Sex makes a bond between you and your husband
God gave men a greater desire - Prov 5:19, "...may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love."
Don't withhold sex from your husband. 1 Cor. 7:3-6, "The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to the husband. The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. When you don't have sex you are opening a door for temptation. Prov 31:11, "Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value." It's for both of you to enjoy not just your husband.
Men want quality vs quanity. They truely desire to make their wives happy.

God honors your choices not your feelings. (there maybe times when you don't "feel like it" so don't lay there like a dead fish - make the choice to enjoy your husband and you might have some fun too) Charity said this - not me. :-)

Remember this - you are modeling marriage for your children!!! Ask yourself this, "Do I want my boys to marry a woman like me?" If you can't answer yes then you have work to do.

"The best thing a man can do for his children is to love his mother" - quote by someone